Sunny with a Chance of Clouds

I had the hardest time waking up this morning!

My husband had the opposite problem and couldn’t sleep, so he started his day earlier than typical and was out the door by 6:30am. He kisses me goodbye when he leaves, so I’m awake for that, and when he’s at his usual hour – an hour later – I often get up and begin my day just after he leaves. But no way did I want to start that early, so I rolled over and fell back asleep.

I woke just before 8am after some vivid and bizarre dreams. That’s almost always true for me when I fall back asleep after waking – weird dreams that go on and on and leave me a little befuddled when I finally become fully conscious.

I woke slowly, and had a hard time “coming to” fully. I rolled onto my back but dozed again, for a minute or so. And I did that several times – repositioned and closed my eyes. I just couldn’t stay fully awake, even though I knew I wasn’t going back to fully asleep.

Maybe it was because this was the first morning in over two weeks that there was no one else in the house. All the holiday company has gone home and the kids have gone back, too. So it’s just me and the kitty again. Maybe I didn’t want to wake to that alone-ness.

Probably because I knew I needed to run an errand before my 9:30 appointment, I got myself out of bed and moving. I would have liked to roll over and try for that fully asleep mode again, even if it meant more dreams. I would have enjoyed a little self-pity – poor lonely me so far from my kids whom I love so dearly and miss so much – but the day was already scheduled full so I needed to get up and get going. I probably scheduled today this way on purpose, to keep myself from the pity party and self-indulgent sadness.  Way to go, me.

Maybe I’ll sleep in tomorrow.